Manners of the Lady & Manners of the Gentleman

I thought I would share this all with you today.. a look at times long gone..  that is for sure.  I got it from an email group quite awhile back. I enjoyed reading it to my children.  Some of these will certainly make you smile and give a little laugh but wouldnÂ’t it be nice to see some of these manners come back??   HoweverÂ…  I still want to wear my pearls in the morning.. LOL..  


The following comes from a book called: What Jane Austen Ate and Charles Dickens Knew by: Daniel Pool   


This book is an enjoyable read.. after reading these my daughter found the book in the library and checked it out.  It was a fun look at this time period.


Manners of the Lady

1. If unmarried and under thirty, she is never to be
in the company of a man without a chaperone. Except
for a walk to church or a park in the early morning,
she may not walk alone but should always be
accompanied by another lady, a man, or a servant.

2. Under no circumstances may a lady call on a
gentleman alone unless she is consulting that
gentleman on a professional or business matter.

3. A lady does not wear pearls or diamonds in the

4. A lady never dances more than three dances with the
same partner.

5. A lady should never "cut" someone, that is to say,
fail to acknowledge their presence after encountering
them socially, unless it is absolutely necessary. By
the same token, only a lady is ever truly justified in
cutting someone: (when a gentleman the lady does NOT
wish to keep company with, refuses to let well enough
alone) Upon the approach of the offender, a simple
stare of silent iciness should suffice; followed, if
necessary, by a "cold bow, which discourages
familiarity without offering insult," and departure
forthwith. To remark, "Sir, I have not the honour of
your acquaintance" is a very extreme measure and is a
weapon that should be deployed only as a last resort.


What Jane Austen Ate and Charles Dickens Knew by:
Daniel Pool pg. 55-56

Manners of the Gentleman

1. In riding horseback or walking along the street,
the lady always has the wall.

Meeting a lady in the street or in the park whom you
know only slightly, you wait for her to acknowledge
you - then and only then may you tip your hat to her,
which is done using the hand farthest away from her to
raise the hat. You do not speak to her or any other
lady - unless she speaks to you first.

3. If you meet a lady who is a good friend and who
signifies that she wishes to talk to you, you turn and
walk with her if you wish to converse. It is not
"done" to make a lady stand talking in a street.

4. In going up a flight of stairs, you precede the
lady; in going down, you follow.

5. In a carriage (stagecoach), a gentleman takes the
seat facing backward. If he is alone in a carriage
with a lady, he does not sit next to her unless he is
her husband, brother, father, or son. He alights from
the carriage first so he may hand her down. He takes
care not to step on her dress.

6. At a public exhibition or concert, if accompanied
by a lady, he goes in first in order to find her a
seat. If he enters such an exhibition alone and there
are ladies or older gentlemen present he removes his

7. A gentleman is always introduced to a lady - never
the other way around. It is presumed to be an honor
for the gentleman to meet her. (
Usually) a social
inferior is introduced to a superior - and only with
the latter's acquiescence.

8. A gentleman never smokes in the presence of ladies.


  1. I love to read things like this concerning manners.I have 2 young boys and it is important for me to teach them to be gentlemen.

    Shalom Aleichem


  2. It's me Leah, I'm not logged in.

    My we've come a long way haven't we...a long way in the wrong direction unfortunately. I am going to read this to my kids- I'm sure they will enjoy it. My husband has a printout of that page from the home economics textbook from the 50's- have you ever seen that?- hanging in his office. When people ask him about it he tells them about me and how I am a lot like that- of course they all think I am a weirdo and call me Leah Ingalls lol



  3. OurLittleHomesteadJanuary 18, 2006 at 1:05 AM

    How interesting!

    Yes--I do believe these manners are long gone--but it's be nice to have a revival!! :)


  4. I loved that! Thanks for sharing :o) It did bring a smile to my face!

    God Bless!


  5. Please say a litle prayer for me and william tonight. Thanks


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